I'll be getting Israeli citizenship.

One week in Mykonos, three sexual encounters, all of them with jewish lads. Isn't that amazing? I have just received the great news: because of my great performance in bed I will be receiving an Israeli passport. That means I will now be beaten up upon entering any Arab country in the world. I'm so goddamn excited.

An other good thing happened while I was in Greece. There was this absolutely gorgeous guy at the beach, American, as it appeared. I've never seen anything like that. Olive skin, short dark hair, bright green eyes and eyelashes that reached as far as Santorini. The only trouble was: he didn't notice me. So this jerk Frank, a pig-like German from Munich puts his chair right next to Mr. Gorgeous. And after a while starts talking to him. I was furious. Even more so when the kid sat down on Frank's chair. I screamed. Then Frank started to touch the guy. I had to leave.

So I told everybody I was going to kill Frank. Which I did. I strangled him with cord and placed his feet in a container with with liquid concrete. After letting it dry I chucked him into the bay. The next day Frank was gone. Everybody asked me what had happened to him. "Oh I killed the bugger", was my reply with a huge smile on my face. They thought it was so funny.

Isn't it strange? If you commit a crime, just tell everyone and make fun of it. Nobody will be suspicious. Besides: no-one can blame an Israeli for ending the life of a German, right?